Guidelines

People sometimes wonder why others treat them the way they do. Truth is, how we treat ourselves indirectly tells others how to treat us. Permission and prohibition stem from the nonverbal statements we make about whether and how we value ourselves. We instruct others in how to love us by how we love ourselves. Dr. […]

Persons matter more than principles. Principles are important, of course, and persons cannot long violate your principles and remain in relationship with you. But if you have to choose between persons or principles, listen to your heart as well as your head. Don’t sacrifice a greater value for a lesser one. Nothing has a greater […]

Love is composed of little things. Grand statements and gestures of caring may excite us, but they are not the substance of love. Love’s substance is the seemingly minor daily exchanges between us and our loved ones. Big things are made up of little things, vast galaxies of infinitesimal particles. Tiny grains of sand compose […]

Take two magnets, possibly off your refrigerator door. Assuming they are positioned positive to negative, as you draw them closer to each other, something quite noticeable happens. A magnetic field comes into existence, which though invisible is nevertheless undeniably real. It seems to arise of itself when the two are brought into proximity. But what […]

Giving and receiving are the breathing out and in of loving. Love itself is always a gift, freely offered. Love cannot be demanded or coerced or purchased into being offered. Intimidation or bribery may propel another to pretend to love, but not the other’s heart to love. Love’s fountain in the heart springs forth only […]

If you cannot forgive a loved one in general, being able to love that person is in jeopardy. Sooner or later a loved one will do something that hurts you. Then a test of love will ensue. Without the aid of forgiveness, you won’t be able to right and restore the relationship. That being said, […]