One of the prayers of John Wesley (1703-1791), who founded the Methodist Church, has been a constant companion for decades. It is about letting go of control, and letting God be in charge, something very difficult for me and for most of us:
“I am no longer my own but Yours,
Put me to what You will,
Put me to doing. Put me to suffering,
Let me be employed for You, or laid aside for You,
Exulted for You, or brought low for You.
Let me be full, let me be empty.
Let me have all things, let me have nothing.
I freely and wholeheartedly yield all things to
Your pleasure and disposal.
And now glorious and blessed God,
Father, Son and Holy Spirit,
You are mine and I am Yours, so be it.
And this covenant now made on earth,
Let it be satisfied in Heaven.
AMEN”
True religion begins when you realize that you are absolutely dependent upon God. It is when you grasp at your deepest level that you are not the “captain of your soul,” as the “Invictus” poem by William Ernest Henley put it. That poem was close to my mother’s heart, and she repeated it with defiant regularity.
When I became a pastor, I adopted Wesley’s words, rather than Henley’s. I would silently repeat during prayer, “I am no longer my own but Yours, / Put me to what You will.” This was especially problematic to pray during troubling times when I thought I could perhaps do a better job of directing my life than God seemed to be doing.
I remember what a very wise Christian woman told me many years ago. She said that spiritual maturity is attained when you are equally willing to sit on the sidelines or to be on the playing field. As a former football player, I could not imagine ever being equally willing to be held back as a reserve as opposed to being out there on the field, blocking or tackling somebody. At the same time, I sensed she was right, and that I was far from maturity.
Well, I think I have finally reached the point where I am equally willing to do whatever God wants me to do. Equally willing, just as long as it is God’s will. I challenge you to pray Wesley’s prayer daily for one week. See what God might have in store for you.
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