Human Relationships

One moment, one time. That is an expression a teacher used during a tea certification in San Francisco a few years ago. She quoted a Zen Buddhist saying which means roughly, “one event, once only.” What it refers to is the fact that life events are in their way unique, one time only, non-repeatable. She […]

Maturity is difficult to gain and difficult to maintain. We may think we have arrived only to have some unexpected and frustrating life turning show us how immature we can still be. We may be very mature about some things some of the time, and perhaps a few things most of the time, but not […]

The older I get, the more I appreciate children. In a recent conversation about children and parenting, I recalled what I wrote many years ago, which has proven so true in my life. It is titled, simply, “Children”: “You who would understand children, first understand the child in you. Therein lies your link with their […]

People sometimes wonder why others treat them the way they do. Truth is, how we treat ourselves indirectly tells others how to treat us. Permission and prohibition stem from the nonverbal statements we make about whether and how we value ourselves. We instruct others in how to love us by how we love ourselves. Dr. […]

Persons matter more than principles. Principles are important, of course, and persons cannot long violate your principles and remain in relationship with you. But if you have to choose between persons or principles, listen to your heart as well as your head. Don’t sacrifice a greater value for a lesser one. Nothing has a greater […]

Love is composed of little things. Grand statements and gestures of caring may excite us, but they are not the substance of love. Love’s substance is the seemingly minor daily exchanges between us and our loved ones. Big things are made up of little things, vast galaxies of infinitesimal particles. Tiny grains of sand compose […]